issue #7 | the pause
š“ on focus, flow, and room to grow.
A list of sensations, as saved in a draft:
Sight ā Your plants in vibrant pots; flowers growing over an abandoned parking lot; a blue sky scudded with clouds after days of haze
Sound ā When a Mariah Carey song comes on in the coffee shop and you hear another Millennial singing along to it behind their mask; the beat drop moment of your favorite songs when you feel like your soulās going to leave your body (but in a good way); the wall of sound that is your family
Smell ā Burnt dough; cigarette smoke (these are both nostalgic smells, so I donāt hate them); a new sandalwood rose candle
Taste ā Frozen blueberries with the consistency of mini-slushies; a buttery tomato galette made in between endless work meetings
Touch ā An extra squishy workout mat; the relief of a hair tie around your wrist (putting your hair up is the first step to getting shit done, Iām sure of it)
The Christine Letter went from "this month's kinda busy!" to a full-on summer hiatus. I donāt think it was just me ā everyone from yoga classes to my favorite newsletters went silent. The magic state of flow and focus became elusive. A search for an article on meditation surfaced one about a dedicated practitioner who experienced a meltdown, which was a sign from the universe to close my browser already.
In the end, I tried a couple of grounding exercises, one of which produced the list above.
Unsaid, unwritten, was that I actually got burned out. Not from writing, but from work, mediating family fights, from more events in this world, the day to day. If you asked, I might not have been able to explain, just that it felt like one big mass of living with goals that feel impossible, and arenāt mine. Oddly, admitting burnout felt like something to be ashamed of, when I donāt embarrass so easily and have actually been burned out before.
Writing is supposed to spill your soul and follow a neat arc of āAnd then I got my groove back,ā but Iāll let this one stand. As a Libra, I donāt like when things are messy, but Iām trying to be ā if not happy with the mess ā at least okay with it for now.
What I do know is that the last time I was burned out, it was a whole bunch of not good. So if youāre in a similar boat, please put on your favorite song, set a boundary, take a pause for yourself.
How are you doing these days? What would your version of your list look like?
THE JAMS
chillhopās fall essentials playlist | I have a hard time listening to podcasts while working unless theyāre going to make me snort-laugh out loud (looking at you, Jonathan Van Ness). Iām a fan of Chillhopās winter and spring essentials playlists, so of course the fall one is on repeat for lo-fi stuff to listen to while working.
te ao mÄrama / solar power by lorde | Lordeās new album was chill but just okay, but the Maori version of her song sounds lovely. For other New Zealand artists, check out my soundtrack to an Australia & New Zealand vacay.
THE READS
āEvery to-do list is a midlife crisis of unfulfilled promise.ā: Wired goes deep on to-do list methods.
āHow Walking (Just Walking!) Changed My Lifeā: A motivating article from Cup of Jo about exercise. Also, itās been a whole ass decade since Iāve read Cup of Jo.
Techniques to move forward in life when youāre exhausted: This HBR article was written for working parents, but I found the techniques to be a useful grounding exercise. My friend Rovana also writes about how she finds work-life balance.
Speaking of a whole ass decade ago, I think you all know about my early career aspiration to work in magazines. If you too dreamed of working for a print or digital mag, you might be tickled by this article about magazine editors moving to tech jobs.
THE FOLIAGE
My plant gang is full, and Trader Joeās has olive trees and all sorts of topiaries which I do not need. If you get one, send photos!
WORK+LIFE | Something inspiring plz?
Hearing other people wax poetic about their dreams and interests is honestly the most inspiring! Also hearing from someone that they've achieved the dreams they had previously, and that any new ones they make will get there in time too.
Wishing you well!